


Five Times Fondue

by mikuridaigo



Series: Judas!Verse [4]
Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Fondue time, I guess this can be considered a crack paring, Judas Verse, Loki is surprisingly not a liar, M/M, This is for my own amusement, fonduing everywhere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-07
Updated: 2012-09-10
Packaged: 2017-11-13 18:24:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/506386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikuridaigo/pseuds/mikuridaigo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>5 fives Loki accidentally caught Coulson and Steve fonduing, and the one time he didn't.<br/>Sequel to "Dodge the Game of Jealously" under the Judas!Verse.</p><p>---</p><p>Chapter 2- Mostly Crack. Loki finds and reads a book called 51 Hues of a Color Between Black and White.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I decided to make Coulson/Cap a Judas verse thing because why the hell not? This chapter hasn't been beta'd because I wrote this for my own amusement, but if the grammar really is troublesome feel free to edit and message me so that I can re-publish it (and credit will be given).
> 
> This is a sequel to "Dodge the Game of Jealously"- you don't have to read it, just know that Phil and Steve basically hooked up and this is what happened afterwards. There are some references to the original Judas if you haven't read that but it's not necessary to understand this. 
> 
> Also if you have the time go back to Judas chapter 14 because I posted some fanart by sakubows.tumblr.com- she has amazing art and doing it for Judas made me smile :D  
> I apologize ahead of time for the ending of this because I had no idea how to end it. Oh well.

Five Times Fondue  

1.

Loki rested his head against the palm of his left hand while he used his right to swirl the spoon in his coffee. He was the only one sitting at the dining table waiting to be able to go to the kitchen to cook breakfast yet the other two occupants insisted that they’ll prepare the food before everyone comes down. They’ve been in there for an hour and Loki was famished.

Clint yawned and scratched his stomach as he made his way down the stairs. With his eyes barely opened he snatched the coffee from Loki and took a big gulp. “I hope you know I mix virgin’s blood in my drinks.”

The archer’s eyes widen and spat out the drink, coughing violently. Loki just smirked and took his cup back. “Thor! Your brother killed a virgin!” Heavy footsteps made their way down along with the voices of Natasha and Sif. Thor’s giant ass smile brightened the room. He patted Clint’s back and ruffled his brother’s hair.

“Oh brother even at the earliest hour you make me laugh.” Loki smirked at Clint and took another sip of his coffee.

Clint groaned. “Ugh whatever. Where’s breakfast? I thought Steve said he’ll be making it for us today.”

“He is, but he has not come out of the kitchen for the past hour.” Loki informed.

Natasha shrugged and pulled out a seat for herself. “Maybe he’s making a huge meal.”

“I hope so.”

Sif stared at the kitchen door and then to the staircase. “Where are Tony and Bruce and the son of Coul?”

“I thought I heard the science bros blowing shit up last- wait Coulson?” Clint asked.

Sif nodded. “I saw him enter the premises last night; it was the Captain who allowed him in.”

The redhead and blonde oaf smiled at each other. “I guess their “secret” relationship isn’t much of a secret is it?”

Clint raised his hands. “Secret? We saw them making out at the baseball game two months ago! Steve and Phil really think that they’re keeping it on the down low? Please.”

The spy rolled her eyes. “Well we know Steve is very awkward when it comes to relationships and Phil is a private man. When they’re ready to tell us they will.”

“I just want my damn pancakes.”

Loki stood up. “Allow me to check. I need more coffee.” He took his coffee mug and went through the double doors to the kitchen when the porcelain cup slid out of his hands and crashed on the floor. On the kitchen counter was a bowl of pancake batter and a half naked Coulson with Steve in between his legs. The SHIELD agent had his head thrown back and his mouth open in a silent cry of pleasure. His hands were tangled in Steve’s blonde hair while the soldier’s hands lightly gripped his lover’s hips to hold him in place. Both were covered in the pancake batter and didn’t hear Loki walk in.

Loki slipped out and headed to his phone that was placed in a random drawer and began to dial. “Who are you calling?” Natasha asked.

He held his index finger up as a gesture of silence. “Hello? Do you do breakfast take out? Yes I would- everything on the menu and send it to the Avengers tower. Thank you.”

Clint looked at the kitchen door. “What about Steve’s breakfast?”

Loki shook his head. “No, we’re not eating- you don’t want to eat the pancakes.”

 

2.

Safe to say Steve and Phil never left the counter top and the Avengers ate the take out breakfast instead. Loki insisted for them not to enter kitchen and eventually they just gave up and went to do their own activities. Loki saved two plates for Bruce and Tony and when they finally emerged from their cave of science Loki pulled Tony to the side tried to tell him the horrific scene he had to witness. His billionaire lover just laughed and kissed Loki. “Really? Steve and Phil doing kitchen sex? Steve could barely hold a _woman’s_ hand in public much less defile the kitchen, which we already did.”

Tony didn’t believe him! But why not? It’s not like the Captain is actually innocent of doing other things (still holding that small grudge when Steve kissed his Tony). So he asked JARVIS to show the security footage but according to the AI, the kitchen cameras were off in both Coulson and Steve’s request. Tony laughed and went to the dining table to join Bruce.

He didn’t bring up Steve and Phil’s private time since he didn’t want to be laughed at. Later that afternoon Bruce and Tony did more experiments and long story short Hulk was sitting in the lab playing with test tubes while Tony was trying to figure out how to turn him back (but Clint was sure that Tony is using that time to make Hulk a scientist or sew him a giant shirt). Anyway they put themselves on lockdown so Loki occupied his time with reading some new erotic novel called 51 Hues of a Color Between Black and White and frankly it was the most boring thing he’s read- even the Coulson-Cap kitchen moment looked more erotic than that rubbish on pages.

To entertain himself with the novel he made funny voices with the characters, and every time the main girl Annie said “my forbidden garden” or “inner mind” or “color between black and white eyes” he’d magically pinch the author in the arm. Maybe she’ll appear on BBC news on ‘author of erotic novel mysterious pinched’. He laughed at the idea and continued to read when a knock at their door interrupted. “Come in.”

Sif opened the door and threw boxing gloves on the bed. “Come, box with me.”

“Why me? Where’s my brother? Or anyone else that doesn’t mind getting their hands dirty?”

“Thor is helping in the lab because the green giant doesn’t like wearing shirts. Natasha said she’s busy shopping on the computer and Clint wants to bother the man of spiders. Spar with me?”

Loki rolled on his back and threw the book aside. “Alright.” He slipped into the giant gloves and followed Sif to the training room. But in the hallway Natasha popped her head out of her room.

“Sorry guys, but Sif? Can I get your opinion on these items?”

“Of course. Loki can you prepare the boxing ring?”

“Yes-yes have fun ordering your female items.” He could have sworn the spy mumbled something about battle axes but he just continued to walk to the gym.

The lights were already on but Loki ignored that and walked to the control panel of the boxing ring when he heard the punching bag’s chain rattle. _Oh, the Captain must be training_. He looked over about to apologize for interrupting and instead heard a grunt. Two grunts, then a moan, and then another man’s voice. “Oh god- Phil.”

He couldn’t see them and he didn’t want to. Loki ran out of the gym but not before locking it from the inside. That’s when Sif finally came down the elevator. “Um- we can’t go in there.”

“Why not? If it’s locked we can ask Tony for the keys.”

Loki shook his head and pushed her to the other direction. “Let’s just use the other gym on the top floor.”

“But that one-

“It is better than this gym Sif.” She would have asked again but Loki just kept tugging at her wrist so she just went along.

 

3.

“Well- well, if it isn’t Mr. Gabriel Hiddleston in his true form.” Maria taunted with her arms crossed.

Loki copied her stance with a smile on his face. “It’s great to see you too Ms. Hill. So how’s the pile of paper work? If you hired me again I could get it done in a couple of hours.”

She rolled her eyes. “What are you doing here?”

The God held out a manila folder. “Barton asked me to deliver his report to Fury.”

“And you’re just doing it?”

“I have nothing else scheduled today. He would have given it to Coulson but we haven’t seen him today. Now may I go to his office?”

Maria leered but allowed him through. Loki could feel her glare burning through the back of his head so he walked even slower with his hips swaying just so the female agent could have an aneurism. He finally made it to Fury’s door and knocked. “Fury, Barton asked me to give you-

With a third knock the door opened and Loki allowed himself in. Very bad idea since Steve had Coulson bent over the table and thrusting his hips while the agent withered under him. Fury’s papers were scatted on the floor with a bottle of lubricant (possibly Tony’s lubricant) by Phil’s hand.

Loki quickly closed the door and walked the other direction when he bumped into the one eye man. “Loki, what the hell are you doing here?”

The raven haired man shoved the files to Fury’s arms. “These are from Barton.”

Fury opened and quickly scanned the file. “Glad to see he actually does his reports but you could have just left these in my office.”

“Actually your office is-” Loki paused and then a smile grew on his face. “Actually I felt like I would have intruded, plus Barton really wanted me to get these to you. Have fun in your office.” He patted Fury’s back and proceeded to leave. But right before he exits the main door a loud girly shriek came from Fury’s office and his smile grew larger.

“What did you do Laufeyson?”

Loki pretended to look wounded. “ _Me?_ I would never! Although you should ask Coulson.” He waved to her and left the headquarters.

4.

Two days later the Avengers were gathered in the living room by Cap’s request. They waited patiently and crowed on the giant couch. Thor sat up like an excited child, Sif picked at her nails and Natasha had her legs over Clint’s lap. Tony sat comfortably on Loki’s lap as the God played with his hair while Bruce had his head back and looked as if he was about to fall asleep on the spot.

Eventually Steve came out of the kitchen with Phil hand in hand and their clothes were wrinkled and un-tucked. Loki could see Tony smirking and winked at Steve who just blushed. “So um, Phil and I are-” They can see Phil rubbing circles with his thumb over Steve’s hand for encouragement. “Phil and I are together- we have been for about 2 months now.”

There was no awkward silence or anyone soaking in the new information. Everyone stood up to congratulate the couple and acted surprise. None of them mentioned the fact that they did not see them making out at the baseball game the month before, nor has Loki reminded them that they had sex in Fury’s office but he praised them nonetheless.

Eventually the team dispersed except for Tony and Loki. “Hey, how about we go on a double date? I know a really good restaurant where Pepper held one of my benefits.”

Phil smiled. “Oh we couldn’t do that-

“No I insist! I’ll make the reservations tonight. Get your best suit Captain.” Tony gave him a thumbs-up and took Loki’s hand to pull him to their bedroom. On their way Tony babbled how proud he was of Steve for finally having a public relationship and that Coulson is able to find someone. The entire time Loki just smiled because hey, he liked Coulson and it is great to see him happy with the man he fan-boyed over since he was a child. Actually that sounded a little creepy but Steve still said yes.

That evening they were dining at the top floor of the Royal Plaza Suite where only the riches of the rich ate with the perfect view of Manhattan. Tony booked a private room with champagne and large windows. They could see Stark Tower glowing in the distance and the Statue of Liberty with her flaming torch. Phil and Steve looked at each other with warm smiles and held each other’s hands under the table.

As much as the new couple tried to order the least expensive dish ($40 dollars for soup, really?) they were served with steak and lobster and anything that neither Phil nor Steve could afford on a regular salary. Phil smiled as Steve fed him a spoonful of lobster meat drizzled with lemon. Tony looked at Loki and held his hand with a gentle grin. Their discussions were mostly about Phil and Steve’s relation, what dates have they been on and their saucy _love_ life. Both blushed at that question and Tony continued to tease them (although at this point the billionaire _still_ didn’t believe that the two enjoy having sex outside the bedroom).

This went on until Phil accidentally spilled his tomato soup on his white shirt. “Damn.”

“Oh, here let me help.” Loki said. “I can get the stains-”

But Phil shook his head. “No it’s fine; I’ll just wash it in the bathroom. Steve, can you help me?”

“Of course.” The stood out of their seats and headed to the bathroom.

Tony leaned back in his chair and touched Loki’s thigh. “So how about a hand job while they’re gone?”

Loki snapped his fingers causing Tony to lose balance in his chair and almost falling. He caught himself and sat properly. “Sorry dear but not right now, they can be back any minute.”

The shorter man smirked as his nimble fingers danced around Loki’s lower region. “It’s a red stain; it’ll take a while before they get it out.”

“Learn some patients Tony, maybe I want to save it for something special tonight.” Loki replied with his mischievous smile.

“Oooh, I like the sound of that. Is it ‘my best friend just got a boyfriend so we celebrate by sex’?”

Loki leaned down to nibble Tony’s ear. “Precisely.”

“I think I don’t mind waiting now. But now that I think of it the stain really isn’t going to be removed tonight. Maybe you should help them so we can finish dinner?”

Loki nodded and headed for the bathroom but when he opened the door no one was in there. He found that pretty strange until he saw two pairs of feet shifting around in the end stall. They made small grunting noises but not so loud so that it could be heard outside of the restroom. Loki smiled and ran out to Tony. “They’re doing it!”

Tony, who was drinking is wine, choked and coughed. “W-what?”

“The Captain and the Agent! They are defiling the bathroom as we speak- come on I’ll show you!”

He pulled Tony’s hand and led him to the washroom. “Okay, if they were doing it, which I’m sure they’re NOT, why do I have to see?”

“So I may prove my word that the Captain and the Agent defile in public areas.” Loki kicked the door down. “See!”

Steve and Phil looked at the threshold where Loki held out his hands and Tony frowned and crossed his arms. The two men were by the sink with wet paper towels and the red stain turning pink. “Um, can we help you?” Steve asked.

Jaw on the floor with widened eyes Loki turned back to his lover. “But- but I was- I saw.”

“Sorry for the interruption you two.” Tony apologized with a smile. “I think the seafood is going to Loki’s head.” He dragged the raven haired man out to sit him back. “What the hell?”

“Tony I swear on my father’s name that they were-” Tony took Loki’s cheeks into his hands and kissed him to silence the babbling god.

“God you are hot when you talk. So how about we defile this dinner table?”

Loki pouted and crossed his arms. Will Tony ever believe him?

5.

The rest of the night was a blast. They walked around the pier, played at the summer carnival (where Loki and Tony went on their third date) and then a Ferris wheel ride before heading back to the tower. The couple said goodnight to each other before a horny Tony dragged Loki to their bedroom and threw him on the bed. Clothes were thrown on the floor and a bottle of lubricant appeared in Loki’s hand. He flipped their positions so that Tony was on his back with his legs spread out. Smirking, Loki licked his lips and proceeded to prepare the billionaire.

“O-oh God! Yes Loki, right there!” Tony had his eyes shut and his head turning side to side while his lover worked between his legs. Tony’s fists gripped the bed sheets while his legs were spread to allow Loki to work that silver tongue of his. The god smirked as he used his thumb to massage Tony’s thighs before dipping his tongue back into Tony’s entrance. “Oh yes! L-Loki stop teasing.”

Instead Loki kissed his hole and proceeded to push his tongue further in. Tony arched his back and cried Loki’s name yet again. He hooked his ankles together to keep Loki in place and the God responded with two fingers inserting inside the shuddering man.

“Would you like more Tony?”

“F-fuck yes I want more! I need- oh- I need… wait! That’s it I got it!” Tony pushed himself off of the bed and away from Loki who just looked completely dumbfounded. Tony was still hard, but he didn’t seem to be paying attention to it as he left their bedroom and out to the hallway naked. Loki just sighed and waved his hand so that he and Tony would at least have some clothes on when they headed to the lab.

This isn’t the first time Tony actually left in the middle of sex and most of the time when an idea would strike Tony would ignore it and wait until they’re done, so leaving now meant that the idea was very important and had to be done.

Loki caught up with him and held his hand. “And what did you “get” exactly?”

“The solution to Bruce and Hulk! I’ll show you the notes when we get there.” Tony pressed the elevator button several times because he was so anxious to go to his lab. Loki snapped his fingers and they were easily transported in. “Thank you.” Tony kissed his cheek and walked to his desk. “Okay so you see how Bruce’s levels of stress cause-

In the back of the lab a beaker fell and crashed on the floor. Both looked up to see if anyone else was in there or if Dummy got loose in the middle of the night. However Dummy was at his charging station. “Hello? Bruce is that you?”

They hear someone shuffling on the floor. Loki approached first with his hands out ready to attack only to slump his shoulder down and ask JARVIS to turn on the lights. Steve and Phil emerge behind the desk with both their hairs ruffled and lips swollen. “Oh! Tony there you are.” Steve said with his face fully flushed and Phil burying is face on the taller man’s shoulder.

Tony examined them head to toe. “Were you two just… _fonduing?”_

Loki turned around. “Fonduing? They were having sex.” Steve shyly nodded.

“That’s what fonduing means in Steve’s language- look never mind but why my lab?”

“Um- we were-” Steve jumped up in order to get back into his pants. “I was going to ask you about the new guns SHIELD gave because you customize weapons so well but then you weren’t here so we-

“Had sex in the lab,” Loki interrupted. “Believe me now Tony?”

Tony just sighed and leaned against the table. “Yes Loki I do now let’s just… it’s late I have a hard on and then I want to sleep. Just turn off the lights when you two are done. “He took Loki’s hand and they left the lab with the Agent and the Soldier in utter embarrassment. Loki followed him still in disbelief himself.

“So that’s all?”

“All what?”

“Your ‘just turn off the lights’. That’s all you have to say to them?”

Tony smiled and kissed Loki. “Hey, you proved me right but I am way too horny to care. Now finish me off?”

As much as Loki wanted to argue back he realized that he was still aroused from their earlier activities and teleported back to the bedroom where he threw Tony on the bed to have his way with him.

\--

1+

In the distance the Hulk’s cry of pain could be heard while Thor continuously fought in the skies. Widow and Hawkeye could barely last on the ground, Tony’s armor was badly damaged and Sif struggled to stay on her feet. Loki switched from his brother’s side to Sif’s to the assassins yet with no progress. The city was under attack by Dr. Doom and his so called ‘doombot’s proved more difficult to fend off than they thought. Every one that was destroyed two more took its place and Doom himself was nowhere to be found.

Above them the helicarrier scarcely stayed in mid-air when one of the engines fell apart. Some of the agents were on the ground as well to fight with as much as they had, and one of those was Coulson. All the communications were scrambled and no one understood each other until Maria tapped into everyone’s frequency. “Agent Coulson is down! I need medical attention! Agent Coulson is down!”

For a split second everyone was so sure that the battle stopped in the horrific news of Coulson’s fall. Somewhere in New York Captain America had just stopped fighting and headed to the SHIELD battle field. Loki immediately disappeared in order to aid the man.

Maria held Coulson protectively as she shot the other robots attacking until Loki created a force field. “Hold his head.” He commanded.

She didn’t question any of his actions. Loki held his hands over Coulson’s stomach and eventually the bleeding stopped. Coulson groaned and both Maria and Loki sighed with relief. “I’m going to take him to the hospital. Tell the Captain where we are.” Maria nodded and helped Loki carry Coulson in his arms. The two disappeared again to reappear in the medical center full of causalities and nurses.

Some were shocked to see Loki in full Asgardian uniform but he held onto Coulson. “Please, we need help.”

One nurse took Coulson on a stretcher to put him into immediately surgery. They asked if Loki needed some help as well but he declined. “No, thank you I can handle myself.” He stumbled to the plastic chairs that were nailed to the wall. Loki blacked out.

He woke up to the sound of an infant’s cries to his left and a monitor to his right. Loki opened his eyes but his vision remained very blurry as he tried to make out the scene in front of him. The door to the room he was in was open and outside were nurses and doctors running around to help the victim’s of Dr. Doom’s attack.

The room grew louder with the cry. He looked down to see the father, who’s head had blood dripping down, trying to cradle it to stop. The man sat in the visitor’s chair while other patients stood or rested on the tile flooring. Some of the other beds were occupied with one or more casualties beside. Gripping onto the metal railing of the bed (who put him in a bed?) he stepped out and offered the bed to the father or anyone else in the room.

He staggered out and headed to the front desk with a nurse scrambling with files of each new patient. “Coulson- what room is Coulson in?”

“I’m sorry sir you’ll have to wait.” She stood up and left the desk. “Doctor there’s another load of people…”

Groaning, Loki took the clipboard of all injured that were assigned to a room and eventually found the agent on the list. _Ugh, top floor…_

He had little energy to teleport himself so he took the elevator. After stopping at every floor for the doctors and patients to be transferred Loki dragged his feet to Coulson’s room. The door was slightly ajar so he walked in hoping that there were no doctors inside.

Instead he heard a man quietly sobbing. Loki peeked in.

Captain Rogers sat right beside Phil. He had an IV on his right hand that was hooked up to a bag. He had bandages on his head and his neck while the monitor showed a steady heart beat. Agent Coulson was alive but his eyes weren’t open. Steve held Phil’s other hand and kissed his knuckles gently. Phil’s hand twitched and then the man groaned. Steve looked at the man to see Phil’s eyes open. He’s silent for a couple of seconds before turning his head to the blonde man. “Steve?”

Steve held his hand tighter and kissed it again. “Hey there soldier.”

“I- ugh, what happened?”

“I watched you, while you were sleeping.” Phil and Steve laughed as the soldier kissed him on the lips. “God I was so worried.”

“But I’m here now.”

“Yes- yes you are.”

Loki never entered the room, but like the other two men he smiled before closing the door to give them their privacy. He sighed and leaned against the door. He remembered being in Steve’s place when Tony fell by Amora’s clutches- just waiting and watching his lover wired with IVs and wondering if he’ll be able to breathe on his own. Just to see the man you love wake up with a smile… well that is one of the greatest feelings in the world.

_Ssshhttt- L… oki…. Loki?_

The static buzzed in Loki’s ear so he tapped at his communicator until it worked. “Tony?”

“Oh thank fuck! Are you okay? Where are you? And how’s Coulson?”

Loki laughed. “He’s fine, he’s awake and the Captain is with him.”

Tony’s laugh was filled with relief. “That’s awesome- really awesome. So Doom is with SHIELD now and we’re still here cleaning up with Damage Control. We’ll visit Phil as soon as we’re done.”

“I’ll tell them that. Don’t hurt yourself picking up rubble.”

“What me? Hurt myself? Now when do I ever do that?”

“We’ll see you later.” Loki turned off his communicator and knocked on the door to Coulson’s room. Steve replied with a “come in” so Loki entered to tend to their wounds. The rest of the Avengers arrived a couple hours later with flowers for Phil and Steve wiped his tears away to act strong. The couple held hands the entire time with smiles on their faces and love in their eyes. Everyone joked to leave so their love making in the hospital may continue but they knew it was just for good humor. Eventually the team did have to go since it would have been too crowded in the hospital room. They said their goodbyes and left Steve to snuggle in that tiny medical bed while watching late night television.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based on the dare I put at the end of the first chapter- Loki was reading 51 Hues of a Color Between Black and White. This is it's contents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is basically crack tastic until the very end. I mean really, Loki feels came out of no where. Maybe a follow up will be written maybe not.  
> In the beginning it was suppose to be a complete parody of the original 50 Shades but I never read the original, just the sex. So when I finally did it was really, really boring. What Loki is reading is basically a summary along with personal thoughts and opinions to that book. Seriously, if you truly like it then your sex life must really suck. Also you must enjoy being abused . I forgot to mention that the reason why Christan Grey does this is because the girls remind him of his birth mother, so finding this sexy means you hate your mom. Okay enjoy.

This story can be found on my [tumblr](http://mikuridaigo.tumblr.com/post/31304961038/loki-reads-51-hues-of-a-color-between-black-and-white)

After breakfast Tony and Loki spent about an hour together just snuggling on the couch before he went back with Bruce to work on their little project. Without him, Loki pondered what he would do with the rest of the day until Thor and Sif came down dressed in their civilian clothing. “Brother, Sif and I are venturing out to the store of books, would you like to join?”

Loki simply shrugged and his civilian clothing fabricated itself on his body. “Going out would be nice. Why do you need to go to the book store?”

“Lady Jane asked to pick up her new textbooks.”

“And I would love to read Midgardian tales based on our adventures.” Sif added.

The three walked a few blocks downtown and arrived to the main shopping area. They received various looks and some children went up to ask for autographs (mostly recognizing Thor) before they were able to enter the store. Thor talked to the cashier first to receive Jane’s books while Sif and Loki looked around. She was immediately intrigued with the Norse Mythology books and adventure novels (the minute she read the summary to Hunger Games she took the trilogy box).

Loki walked around the shelves and found no interest in the any books until he heard two women giggling over a book displayed on a table. He peeked over and read the sign “51 Hues of a Color Between Black and White”. The women opened the pages and blushed before going to the register to purchase it. He picked one up and turned to the back.

“Are you interested in America’s number 1 erotic and romantic novel?”

Loki jumped at the voice right in his ear and the book almost fell out of his hand. “Excuse me?”

The store worker tilted his head slightly before smiling. “Ah I’ve seen you on the news. Loki is it? Tony Stark’s boyfriend?”

The man must have watched the news or the celebrity show TMZ since he is only recognized as Tony’s boyfriend. “Yes, yes I am.”

“Well anyway the contents in that book will definitely spice up your relationship.” He explained with a wink.

“Really now?”

“Yup! Many women love this- one of the kinkiest books out there. Buy all three for a discount.”

Loki just gave a fake smile at the overly friendly worker. “Thank you but I think I’ll just read this first.”

“Very well then, come to the register.” By that time Sif and Thor were at the register as well to purchase their books and Loki slipped his book in the pile too. The two warriors questioned his choice but Loki scoffed and said it’s for Tony. They don’t question him after that and instead have a light lunch by a café before returning home.

Loki took his book and disappeared to his and Tony’s room lie on his back and read the summary and reviews. “Number 1 book in America; most erotic novel ever; a must read!” He shrugged because if it’s that good, why not? He turned to the first page.

_Oh my gosh! Why am I so ugly?! No matter what I do I will always look so plain and ugly even though I get asked out a lot. But my roommate Ebony-Swan McPerfect will always look so hot even when she’s sick like a cancer patient. “I’m sorry Annie but I’m sick like a cancer patient but the interview with Mr. Color Between Black and White is like so totally and really important!”_

_I scowled at her but kept trying to look pretty anyway. “Fine, but I’m only doing this because it’s for college- or something. Need any medicine?”_

_“S-some cough syrup would be-_

_I left the apartment before she could ask for her medicine because meh, she can take care of herself. I go into my car and start driving to Between Black and White industries where I was suppose to interview the CEO, Mr. Edward Between Black and White. That last name was long but just so sexy and mysterious._

Loki paused and held the book away from him. Was this the sexy stuff? He’s watched pornos (he becomes really lonely when Tony’s on his business trips) with so called ‘plots’ that have a better opening sequence that this novel- and the girl _Annie was it?-_ was already so annoying. Maybe if he kept reading something good will come out of it.

And he was wrong. The first chapter contained literally nothing but dialogue between Annie and Mr. Between Black and White, mostly the interview questions Ebony had provided for her. She immediately calls him a control freak (which he is) and for some reason she was always getting flushed. Was he really that handsome because he read no detail to his features that make him ‘so incredibly beautiful?’

He groaned loudly. “A handsome CEO is Tony Stark.” He said to the book. God he missed him, stupid science experiments in the lab…

Well she seemed super disgusted with his attitude of power (Tony doesn’t like power, he just enjoys annoying the fuck out of everyone) while Mr. Between Black and White bragged about his multi-billionaire company. What the hell did he do anyway that made him so rich? Make weapons? Build appliances? Did he steal from the government and pretend he has a company of nothing?! Argh the book doesn’t make sense!

And how many times has she said ‘crap’?! Like 40 in just this chapter? So far the book went so far below his expectations and he almost threw it aside, but as stated earlier he had nothing else to do. Might as well try to find the smut.

Also they murmur a lot. How do they understand each other without speaking in full syllables?

So the interview ends and Annie is screaming in her head because _no man has ever given me that feeling. Was it the money he stole from small companies? Was it the way he screwed the poor people like those Republicans? I do not know but my heart just might burst! And his eyes- oh those incredible eyes that were the color between Black and White-_

“Woman the color is gray! That is the color between black and white!”

_By the time I get into my car I’m hitting my head against the wheel. What kind of questions did Ebony make me ask? They were just soooo personal and asking if he was gay? Obviously not because no CEO that handsome could be gay!_

“Ha, go tell Tony Stark that.” Tony was more bisexual than gay, but the way he sucked Loki’s cock anyone would think Stark was really gay.

_Eventually I arrive home where Ebony, who somehow looks so much, better, asked how the interview went. I gave her a summary of the interview and blah blah blah my mother came to town blah blah there’s a boy who likes me but he’s not sexy/abusive enough for my liking blah- I meet up again with Edward Between Black and White and we chat about my boring life blah- I murmur (_ Loki began to tally how many times she’d murmured) _and then ZOMG he kissed me! Edward Between Black and White kissed me! I suddenly feel faint because that was my first kiss…EVER. But alas, it is too much and I must focus on school! We eventually pull away and he tells me “Good luck on your exams” and I almost faint again! Oh he’s so dreamy and heavenly, but alas it is difficult because I’ve never been in a relationship before. I’m far too shy and pale and ugly and have no sense in males what so ever! I mean, I guess that one guy in my class likes me, he leaves me notes and shit but I could never love him because he’s not Edward Between Black and White. But he’s still nice- maybe I should talk to him._

_No! My inner mind yelled at me like a simile because I know I want Edward!_

Loki flipped the pages to try to find the sexy scenes because if he wanted to hear about her life he would have first ten something chapters of read Dusk-Light.

So she almost gets hit by a bike or something, she falls into a ‘comatose’ (most likely she was just passed out due to exhaustion), Edward makes a joke about necrophilia (Loki threw up a little) and then she uses his shower. This is not sexy at all. “ _I used your toothbrush.” I said, wiggling my eyebrows to look sexy. He smirked and slapped my ass. “Oh really now Annie?_ Loki groaned because using someone’s toothbrush was just gross. He doesn’t share his with Tony, Jane certainly doesn’t with Thor and last time someone drank out of Bruce’s coffee cup he Hulked out. Avengers were germaphobe, or they simply knew boundaries between partners.

He skimmed the last page of chapter 6, which goes as: “ _Would you like to join me in the toy room?” He asked, gently rubbing my back._

_“Toy room? Like board games or Barbie dolls?”_ Loki slapped his forehead.

_He smiled at me and opened the door. I gasped as I entered and I think I used TARDIS to time travel back to the Aztec temples of sacrifices. Holy moly._

Loki placed the book on his lap and rubbed his eyes. Aztec temple sacrifices weren’t sexy, they were bloody. Well, it seemed like the sex was coming up so might as well torture his eyes.

_The room is filled with various leather and metal toys. The bed had handcuffs and rope attached to the headboard while the couch had penis shaped silicon sticking out. Basically all the dirty things that are only found in a sex shop were here, in his toy room._

_“I’m a flogger.” He said proudly._

_A flogger? I had no idea what that was- but DAMN my secret garden began to jump for joy because this is hot!_ Loki raised his eyebrow. Secret garden? Was that in reference to her vagina or the pubic hair covering it?

_“Please say something Annie- you’re quietness is scaring me.”_

_Why is he scared? I was scared with what that rope is used for, and I don’t think that dildo can actually fit inside someone. “Do- do you do this with people or do they do it with you?”_

_He sighed. “I usually do it to them. But- but with consent of course”_

_“But- if you have people who want to then why am I here.”_

_Edward smiled. “Because I want to do it with you.”_

_“Are you a sadist?” I gasped._

_“No, I like to hit and dominant women and leave markings on their skin while I fuck her brains out.”_

_“And why would I do that?”_

_“To please me.” He replied, his smile growing bigger. I can feel my secret garden swooning and I, myself, start to feel dizzy too. To please him! “But… we can’t just jump into this. We need terms and conditions, if this is going to happen._

Loki groaned and hit his head against the book because there was no way this was an erotic yet romantic work of fiction. This was in no way ‘romantic’- and the dialogue. So much fucking dialogue and flat characters Loki wanted to laugh. People are actually reading it, and he’s one of them. What did he buy?

He skimmed along because all they do is talk about nothing, but he stopped at the ‘rules in a relationship.

_Submissive (the woman) will obey everything the dominant says or does- in and out of the bedroom. She will only wears the clothes chosen by the dominant, eat in a healthy diet with no snacks (unless it’s fruit) and she must stay lubricated because the dominant may fuck her any time, even when she doesn’t want it._ “Isn’t that rape? The hell- this is romantic?!”

_Failure to adhere to the rules will result in punishment decided by the dominant. Holy fuck this is so hot. Of course he still had limits, like the gentleman he is. Those involved no fire play, no breath play, no animals or children involved, urination_ (This time Loki had to go to the bathroom to spit out some vile) _dead bodies or anything that can draw blood._

_“Is there anything you wanted to add?”_

_“I-I don’t know.”_

_“Well are there certain things you don’t like to do while having sex? Anything that makes you uncomfortable?” He sounded so concern, it was making my heart tighten up!_

_“I don’t know because I-I’m… I’m a virgin.” Yes! Super embarrassing right? I’m 20 something and I’m a virgin standing in the playroom of a beautiful man with eyes the color between Black and White._

_“You never…” He closed his eyes and growled deeply. When he opened them he looked at me with anger and lust. “You’re a virgin? Why didn’t you say earlier?!” He’s yelling at me now and I quiver with fear yet passion. He’s so demanding that I can’t help but actually submit to answer._

_“Show me how you pleasure yourself bitch.” He demanded._

_“What?”_

_“I want to see you cum- do it in front of me, NOW!”_

_I shake my head nervously. “I don’t- I never touched myself…” I never thought about sexual pleasure, always too busy with my studies and being super smart you know? But I feel guilty for some reason, and now this beautiful and sexy man is propositioning me for sex, I must do it because HOT DAMN his voice is like an orgasm (although I don’t know what that feels like)._

_He eventually calmed down and apologized for his outburst. He said that he just suspected that I wasn’t a virgin because of my interest in his playroom and I find myself holding back a moan by biting my lip. I do this at least 10 times before he asked what was wrong, and then said “I want to bit your lip.” He pulled me into a fierce kiss, one hand gripping my chin and the other touching the front side of my jeans._

A knock on his door interrupted his reading. It was Sif who was asking if he wanted to spar in the gym for a bit. Since the book was really boring (even the lead up to the sex was just dribble) he took a break for a spar. An hour later (after witnessing another Cap-Coulson sex time) he returned to his room and continued.

_“Please Annie, let me take your virginity.”_

_“Yes! Oh Yes Edward- let’s do it now.”_

_We stripped each other of our clothing before he threw me on the soft silky sheets of his double king sized bed. I wondered why it was so big- then I gasp! He must have had more than ONE person on this bed! Was that even legal?_

_He ripped me away from my thoughts when he pinches my now hard nipples and I scream out in pleasure. “Ohh, I like this response.” He leaned down to lick me- EVERYWHERE and I moan and gasp and crumble under his touch. No one has ever done this to me and IT JUST FEELS SO GOOD._

_I spread my legs and he sat up on his knees, his large eeerrrection pressing against my- ohh I’m too embarrassed to say it- my special place hehee._

Loki slapped his forehead in utter mortification for the narrator. He just had to know, why couldn’t she say her genitals, her vagina, her opening? There are many words that could have been used besides ‘special place’ because there’s not enough specification to where that is! Loki’s special place was the café just around the corner. Tony introduced the tiny shop just after New Years and he loved it- the coffee was good, they had amazing snacks and he knew the manager. Most of the time they go there together just for cute small talk about Tony’s work and Loki just found it so romantic and relaxing.

_With my legs spread he immediately pushes in and I scream out in pain. God damn he is so BIG and I have no idea how other Edward could even fit!_

“No- no lubricant? No preparation? That would hurt her.”

_It hurts too much- I don’t think I can take it. He pulled out and smirked. “Do you like it Annie?” I-I actually don’t- I didn’t expect it to hurt so much and I want to stop. But I don’t reply because I agreed to this…_

_He thrusted in again and once again I cry. It’s so dry down there and every thrust was just painful and-_

Loki threw the book against the wall and shook his head. He wanted to return to the book store, slap the sales person and burn every copy of that book because that so called ‘romantic and erotic sex’ was nothing more than words of a mindless woman and her being raped. What Edward was doing wasn’t that sweet vanilla sex you’re supposed to have with your first time, and his dominant ego just powered over Annie to the point where she doesn’t care about her own body and just allowed him to have his way with her.

What made it worse though is that his and Tony’s first time wasn’t that vanilla sex either. Tony was drunk and crying because of his unrequited love of Steve Rogers and Loki took advantage of that, while in another body. The next morning Tony said he didn’t mind and he wanted to continue their relationship, but still- it wasn’t romantic.

Later that night Tony finally emerged from his lab and had dinner with the rest of the Avengers. He and Loki retreated to their room where he said he was going to take a shower. Loki embraced him from behind and buried his face in Tony’ shoulders. “May we bathe together?”

Tony smiled. “Of course. JARVIS, please prepare the bath.” His AI does and after stripping off their clothes they entered the tub with Tony between his legs. Loki took the shampoo and applied it to Tony’s head before he started to scrub. Tony sighed with content as he sunk in the tub and blew the bubbles away. Loki mostly cleaned all the oil and grease from Tony and then rinsed in the shower. Neither of the two made any sexual touches, just a couple cleaning each other in a giant bathtub.

After brushing they finally go to bed. Loki spooned Tony with one hand lightly resting on the arc reactor and the other around his stomach. The God gave light kisses on the back of Tony’s head, making the billionaire flush. “Why so intimate tonight?”

Loki took a deep breath and held him closer. “It’s nothing… I’ll tell you later.” Tony just shrugged and yawned before falling asleep in the God’s arms. It took Loki much longer to do so as he kept thinking about their first time. He told himself he was no Edward Between Black and White, but he knew he had to make it up to Tony, somehow.

**Author's Note:**

> Some dare me to write 51 Hues of a Color Between Black and White and I'll do it.


End file.
